The Garlic Plight: Less is More (The Self-Editing Guide Part 9)

Imagine you are making your favorite dish for someone really special. There’s this certain ingredient called for in the recipe (let’s say garlic) that just sets off the meal. You’ve received lots of praise when adding this particular ingredient, and you just know it’s what will win your friend over when he takes that first bite. So you add a dash or two as usual, but that’s not enough. This person is really special, and you want to make sure he can taste the special ingredient. So you keep dashing in the flavor until you’re certain it will stand out above everything else. He will have no choice but to notice it and be impressed now.

However, when he takes that first bite, his eyes bulge and his face twists as he chews. He nods with fervor and gives the thumbs up, but something is off. Is he simply excited over how delicious it is? Surprised, even? He grabs his water and gulps it down before looking at you and asking what you put in it. It’s clear by his expression and timid voice he’s nervous about something. Finally, he admits there’s just this one flavor overriding everything else, and it would be delicious if it wasn’t so strong.

You’re deflated. You tried so hard to impress your friend, but instead of letting the garlic accent the meal, you let it take over and failed tremendously. So, what do you do? You probably vow to avoid adding garlic to any recipe in the future and clean your fridge of the horrid stuff, but is that really the right choice? Had you neglected to add garlic at all, your friend would have eaten a bland meal devoid of the one thing your previous subjects all praised. Would he have finished it? Probably. Would he have remembered it? Probably not.

The key in this scenario is to always remember one three-letter phrase that keeps beautiful or delicious add-ons in check: less is more.

As a writer, I’m sure you’ve noticed how often people bash adverbs. I never even considered writing an article about them because of this bit of advice I usually come across daily:

“Cut all adverbs.”

“Adverbs weaken your narrative.”

“Adverbs are for the amateur writer trying to impress and wow the reader.”

These are all true to some extent. Too many adverbs do weaken your narrative. New writers do go overboard with adverbs because they think it’s a good way to impress the reader. Adverbs do wow the reader.

Yes, I said that. Adverbs wow the reader. Why else do you think they’re so overused now? Much like the analogy of too much garlic, we discovered what works and we went overboard with it. We want to be the best, right? So we do whatever it takes to stand out from other writers. We think, for a moment, that we can add more beautiful adverbs than anyone else and be remembered for our moving prose. But that’s not how it works.

Adverb inclusion is not the key to moving prose—or maybe it is, it’s a matter of opinion just like the garlic—but that doesn’t mean the reader wants to see nothing but adverbs. An adverb is more like a trump card you use when the narrative calls for it. A trump card is not to be used often, and you should exhaust all other outlets before you resort to wasting it. An adverb is your ace in the hole when you want to write something worth remembering . . . something worth quoting.

Here are two examples of times when adverbs were used effectively:

1. “When we force something to fit where it doesn’t belong, it breaks. When surrounded by people who can’t appreciate our beauty, humans essentially do the same.” —Kayla Krantz
2. “The heavy ache in my chest suggested that I was simply trying, and failing, to trade one heartbreak for another. While I still waited for my mind to accept the good news and relinquish all the pain it no longer had reason to feel, my stubborn heart tightened its grip on the past, refusing to forget. It happily lapped up this new betrayal, these freshly severed ties to another I’d loved with such devotion. I never would have imagined that in gaining what I thought I’d wanted most, I would lose something of equal importance, finding myself right back where I had begun.” —Jessica V. Fisette

This is my opinion, and as you can see, one of the quotes are written by yours truly. However, Kayla Krantz’s quote has stuck with me for two reasons.

Number one: It’s true. There’s no doubt the reality of these words resonate within me and will continue to do so for days to come.

Number two: That adverb cannot be removed.

Every time I think back to this quote, I think of the adverb. The editor in me tries so hard to remove it, but it doesn’t read the same. And the writer/poet in me smiles because I can’t take it out. Without that adverb, the entire quote loses something—it loses a huge part of what makes it memorable.

I had planned to write an article on why adverbs are bad, but I have to admit this quote changed my mind. Then, I remembered an ad I created a while back for my upcoming release featuring the second quote, and again, tried to reread the quote without simply and happily. The intended meaning/effect is lost.

But one thing I have to point out is how much Kayla and I both try to avoid overusing adverbs. The reason the quotes aren’t filled with five adverbs to every verb is because we KNOW less is more. The adverbs that made the cut were carefully selected and strategically placed. There was a time I would have added multiple adverbs to that quote, and considering how old it is and how many times I’ve edited it, there were probably a few more that met an untimely demise as I honed my skills as a writer.

So remember, less is more. Don’t purposely choose a weak verb so you can spice it up with an adverb. Don’t run to the thesaurus so you can find all the different ways to exchange sprinted for speedily, hastily, carelessly ran or any other combination of a weak verb with multiple adverbs chasing after it. Sprinted is always more exciting than ran, no matter how many pretty helpers you tack on. But don’t neglect them altogether. Adding a strategic amount of adverbs to your narrative can help it feel well-rounded and read smoother.

How do you handle adverbs? Are you a fan of using them to achieve poetic prose, or does the very sight make your editor’s eye twitch? We’re interested in hearing your take on the topic in the comments!

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FIRST QUOTE FROM KAYLA KRANTZ’S RITUALS OF THE NIGHT SERIES:

SECOND QUOTE FROM THE ALDURIAN CHRONICLES:

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Jessica Victoria Fisette is the author of The Soul Reaper series, Fragments, and The Aldurian Chronicles. Her hobbies include discovering the benefits of natural medicine, wine tasting, and trying new recipes in the kitchen. She likes to unwind by typing out a scene or two in her latest obsession or indulging in a good book. Having been passionate about writing since she was a little girl, she is constantly coming up with new ideas for future stories and creating unique, strongwilled—albeit flawed—characters to overcome the difficult obstacles she places before them. Having spent all her life in rural Southeast Texas, she appreciates the tranquility of country living and hopes to implement such a love for nature into her beautiful, ever-so-curious little girl.

You can follow her by clicking the links below. 

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Guest Blog: The Work by Kenneth Lawson

One sits in front of a blank computer screen and wishes the words would just magically appear on it. If one could only twitch a “Bestselling American Novel.”  But alas, the only person who could twitch a novel into existence was Samantha from the TV show Bewitched.

In September 1964, a new show arrived on ABC television. Bewitched followed the misadventures of a female witch married to a mortal man. A half-hour comedy that put a variety of interesting spins on normal family and business life with a witch involved.

What piqued my interest in this show concerning writing is one specific visual trick that they often used on the show. Samantha twitching her nose and making miraculous things happen. House cleaned, animals and people appear or vanish, and that’s just the small stuff the writers had her doing. While the effects worked perfectly in the overall story of the characters and their made-up world, in the long term, this introduced the audience to a concept of “Instant Gratification.” All they had to do was want something, and it would appear out of nowhere.

While anyone in their right minds knows we can’t just twitch our nose and get our work done, or clean our house, or any of the other things they did on the show, there is a broader concept or idea if you will. The idea that a vast majority of the things one wants or needs can almost magically appear.

A key example of this is Amazon. As anyone who belongs to their Prime service knows barring weekends, and holidays or the like that if they order something on Monday morning, chances are very good the UPS truck will be at their door by Wednesday afternoon. This, in fact, a form of “Nose Twitching”  One wants it, a couple of mouse clicks and the package on its way.  Not much more energy expended than twitching one’s “Nose.”

Another great example of the “Bewitched Syndrome” is Pandora, or any online music or movie service. One wants to listen to some classic Sinatra,  a couple of clicks on their mobile device of choice and it plays. One wants to watch a movie or series, a couple of clicks on the remote, and it’s playing on their preferred screen.
There was a day not that long ago when if one wanted to listen to Sinatra croon one had to do “The Work.”

Go to the record store, find and buy a Sinatra record, go home, remove the record from its jacket, place the vinyl record gently on the turntable to keep from scratching it and turn on the record player. The record spun, and mechanically, the arm with the needle moved over to the record and dropped, and the sounds of music came from the speakers. But wait, you weren’t done.

Once that side was over, in about 10 -15 minutes, you had to remove yourself from your favorite listening place and return to the turntable, turn the record over and repeat the process. These are but two of the many examples of the way people have unconsciously​bought into the “Bewitched Syndrome.”

Years ago there was only ONE phone in a house. It usually hung on the kitchen wall, with a LONG cord to the receiver. If one wanted to call someone, they had to know the actual phone number. In years gone by, they didn’t have 7 digit numbers like we do today, you had an exchange, such as the famous BR-549 from Hee Haw fame. You called the operator and told her who you needed to call, and she’d connect you manually to her switchboard. See. More work.

And if you missed a call, You were out of luck, and probably never know it, unless they told you later they tried to call. Today? Instant access, the “Bewitched Syndrome.”

There are so many examples of  “The Bewitched Syndrome” and how it is incredibly easy today to “Twitch” our way through life. To have a wide variety of things done or gotten for us almost magically.

But there are a lot of things there is NO shortcut for. Writing is one of them.

To create, one must sit down and actually do the work. Write the words, build the paragraphs and the chapters, and eventually one word at a time, build a book.
And you can be proud of it. Because you didn’t make it appear out of thin air, you did the work, put in the time, and energy it takes to create.

Bewitched has inspired a generation to create new worlds and tell new tales in different ways. The Bewitched writers did the work to create a television program. Now you must do the work to make your stories come alive, as actress Elizabeth Montgomery did the work to make Samatha come alive on the screen.

Yes, I’ve wished many times over the years I could twitch my nose and have my stuff done.

But alas, I’m mortal like the rest of us.

And I have to do is“The Work.”

 

Author Bio:

Kenneth Lawson was born in 1961, in Western NY. He was born with a heart disease, called Transition of the Arteries. He is believed to be the first in the US to survive the procedure called the Mustard procedure.

He started writing as a teenager He enjoys classic movies and television, and a variety of music. When not enjoying movies. He can be found writing his eclectic mix of science fiction, mystery, and time travel.

Today he lives in Central Virginia, with his wife of 30 years, and the youngest of their four children.

 

Laughing Our Words & Other Dialogue Don’ts (The Self-Editing Guide Part 8)

Dialogue is an important thing in story-telling. How your character interacts with their friends, family, and even complete strangers tells a lot about his or her personality and conveys information that might not be revealed otherwise. How you describe that dialogue has a huge impact on your audience’s experience while reading your novel. So should you replace your dialogue tags with descriptive words and throw in a few adverbs? Not exactly. If you want to truly immerse your readers in your story, you’re better off doing the exact opposite.

I like to write in deep point-of-view, which means my goal is to make the words fall away. I don’t just want the readers to see the story unfold before their eyes, I want them to become part of the story. I want them to be in the middle of the action, not just watching from the sidelines. I want them to become the main character—to fight the battle and feel the pain as the sword goes in. So when I’m writing dialogue, any reminders that my audience is reading a story has to go.

Dialogue tags might be one of the most redundant aspects of writing. You add quotations around the spoken passage, and then you end it with he said or something similar to state who is speaking. But there are better ways to clarify this. Here are a couple examples of using a dialogue tag and how to get away with removing it.

“How are you feeling today?” Sarah asked. 

How are you feeling today?” Sarah stepped closer and pressed her hand to my forehead. 

The first one is a classic example of a dialogue tag. The second one removes the uneccessary phrase, clarifies who is speaking by the action that takes place, and shows the characters interacting in other ways as well. The second part of sentence two eliminates the need for tagging and that’s a good thing. Since it is a classic example, anything remotely close to she said or he asked tends to get skimmed over by readers. They’ve seen it more than enough in other novels. In this way, you’re still offering valuable content to your audience while keeping them from being confused on who is speaking.

Some people like to include both in their writing:

“How are you feeling today?” Sarah asked, stepping closer and pressing her hand to my forehead.

But this is even more redundant, since it can be reworded like the second example where the action alone states who is speaking. And, as we covered in the last article, -ING verbs slow down the narrative. If this is supposed to be a fast-paced scene, you’re going to want to drop those -ING verbs and keep the sentences direct and to the point.

So, again, it’s best to just use an action tag to clarify who is speaking. However, if the characters are speaking for a long period of time, you won’t be able to come up with an action for every line—and you shouldn’t try. You need to let the characters’ words take the spotlight in this scenario. That means most times the dialogue needs to stand alone. If there are only two people speaking, then character one will speak first, then character two, and then it starts over. In this case, you can go a few lines without reiterating who is speaking. The reader will have no problem keeping up, as long as it isn’t too drastic of a gap. A brief action tag after a few exchanges can keep the reader on track and immersed in your story. However, if they have to go back to the beginning of the conversation and start over just to figure out who is speaking toward the end, you’ve lost the intended effect. So don’t go overboard. As I often say, a healthy balance is key.

Another issue I see often is when writers choose to use dialogue tags and they use them incorrectly.

“That was funny,” Sarah laughed.

This is actually an action tag formatted wrong. NOT a dialogue tag. However, it is set up as if laugh is replacing said. That means Sarah is laughing out the phrase, “That was funny.” This happens often with various words such as laughed, sighed, yawned, coughed, cried, etc. This is the correct way to write it:

“That was funny.” Sarah laughed. 

In this example, Sarah speaks, and then she laughs. Makes sense, right? Often times it’s written in an even less plausible way:

“That was funny,” Sarah rolled her eyes. 

There is no doubt about it—this is an action tag. NOT a dialogue tag. You can’t roll your eyes into a series of words—that I’m aware of—so this sentence needs to be reworded as this:

“That was funny.” Sarah rolled her eyes. 

The difference is in whether you separate the text with a comma or a period. Keep this in mind when reading over your work and train yourself to take notice how you write your dialogue. The change in meaning can be tremendous, and it’s best to know exactly what effect your writing has on readers when you’re trying to write convincing dialogue. Incorporate these tips into your story and you will have a better chance at immersing your readers and creating realistic character interactions.

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Jessica Victoria Fisette is the author of The Soul Reaper series, Fragments, and The Aldurian Chronicles. Her hobbies include discovering the benefits of natural medicine, wine tasting, and trying new recipes in the kitchen. She likes to unwind by typing out a scene or two in her latest obsession or indulging in a good book. Having been passionate about writing since she was a little girl, she is constantly coming up with new ideas for future stories and creating unique, strongwilled—albeit flawed—characters to overcome the difficult obstacles she places before them. Having spent all her life in rural Southeast Texas, she appreciates the tranquility of country living and hopes to implement such a love for nature into her beautiful, ever-so-curious little girl.

You can follow her by clicking the links below. 

Facebook

Twitter

Website

You’re Stupid and Your Writing Sucks (Guest Article by David Noe)

Ha-ha! What a funny title! Of course, this can’t possibly be a blog telling someone they’re stupid and that their writing sucks. That’s insensitive, and possibly wrong, right? Yeah, no. This is really an essay on making yourself better. Stated plainly, you can’t get better if you don’t know you need help. Sure, plenty of writers have a hard time, thinking their writing is below average, but there’s a very good reason for that. It’s called math, and writers aren’t generally very good at math. By definition, half of everything ever written is below average. That’s what makes it the average!

Okay, so how do you get on the right side of the coin? You can take all kinds of courses and classes and read all the books that claim they will make you great and you could still be lousy. Feeling better yet? You want to know how to get better? This isn’t the essay for that. You might as well stop reading. The truth is, I don’t care if you’re a good writer or not. I don’t care, and most other writers don’t care, and your neighbor doesn’t care, and neither does their cat. Some self-help books are written for a very specific reason . . . to sell self-help books. If you become a great writer, you may not buy any more of their self-help books. Where would they be then?

I’ll tell you what I want when I read a book. I want to enjoy the book. I don’t give a hang about where the author lives or what the author eats or who the author votes for. I just want a good story. You write a good story and you’ll be a good writer. Too simple? It comes so easy for some people. Yep. That’s the way life is. So, is this one of those tough love type columns? No. I really don’t care about you.

Here, then, is the value of this essay. Only you can prevent forest fires. There is so much value put in buying your way into being a good writer. There is so much coddling of sub-par writers. Nobody wants to hurt anybody’s feelings. Hey, I get it. Who wants to be barraged with a thousand hate-filled posts about what a butt you are for saying something mean (not that I would know)? You’ve got to do you. When I was learning to write comic book scripts, I was fortunate enough to have a professional school me on just how rough my drafts were. I must have rewritten that stupid script a dozen times. Each time, he would absolutely tear it into little bitty pieces. I had read the books. I had even had stories accepted, and I thought I knew what I was doing. It was very ‘Dunning-Kruger’ of me. I was stupid and my writing sucked, and I was extremely fortunate to have somebody tell me that (over and over).

Be smart enough to find somebody better than you (at least half the population) who you feel you can trust. Let yourself be torn apart, BUT only about your writing. Prepare yourself, expect bad news, accept bad news. Write and rewrite and write again. Listen to how stories and conversations actually work. Pay attention to life to develop an ear. If you really want to be better, know that you are one of the ones who has to put the work in. Other people are born with it, not you. You must work at it because you are stupid and your writing sucks and nobody cares . . . until you do. Be a better writer because you want to actually write better, not because you want accolades. Be smarter about your talent because you are paying attention, not because you want people to be in awe of you.

Okay, the secret of this essay is that most of the time, it’s narrated by you. One of the truths is that we can always better ourselves, but there will always be critics. Another truth is that nobody will care about your stories or your abilities unless you do. If you think you are a bad writer, you will be. If you think you are a great writer, you’re probably wrong. Never think you’re a great writer. That’s one sure way to not be a great writer. Always tell the best story you can. Care about your work. Then, the next time you tell a story, tell a better one.

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David Noe has several books published by Amazing Things Press (novels, short story and novella collections, poetry, even some humorous, etcetera). He is co-founder and editor at InDELLible Comics. yadayadayadabuymybooksonamazon

His author page on facebook is https://www.facebook.com/tradeofthetricks/

Pricing: A Personal View

Greetings one and all. I have seen a number of posts over my time here regarding the tricky issue of pricing. I rather suspect that there is no formula to adopt and that it is very much a personal choice based on your own set of criteria.

Hopefully, it will be of use to some of you for me to set out the decisions that I made and the reasons behind them.

I am including personal sales information in this article, simply to help those who are starting the author journey to understand the financial decision-making tree a little better.

My motivation for writing was not to make money, but to tell the story that I had always wanted to tell. That governed my decision-making throughout. In any case, I never imagined that I would sell many books, so the experience and the end product were paramount in my view.

Once I had set myself on that path, the pricing strategy was easy to decide upon. Pricing to encourage people to read meant aiming relatively low.

At that time, I looked at e-book pricing and thought that, despite being new into the field, the download version was a tad overpriced, compared to the book you buy on the High Street.

The decision to pitch my e-book under High Street prices seemed reasonable enough, and many authors seemed to agree.

I spoke with friends, relatives, and acquaintances in the USA, and the general feeling from them was ‘something’ and 99 cents was appropriate. Against advice, I settled on $4.99 as my e-book price. Bear in mind at this point that my first book, Opening Moves, was 812 pages.

Quite clearly if I had been in it for the money, creating two books out of that lot would have been easy enough. However, that was where the book finished and that was that.

So Opening Moves was set at $4.99 for Kindle, and equivalent across the other kindle selling platforms from Japan to Germany. For some reason, I also decided to have a common pricing policy and, having openly stated that in RG forums and on the website, I was committed to it.

The royalties from e-sales are shown in the charts attached, so I won’t repeat them here.

It was when I went to Createspace that the ‘size V amount of work V royalty’ issue raised its ugly head.

Createspace is an on-demand publisher, which simply means that when you click to buy, they print the book and send it to you. This means that their costs are higher than those of a traditional publisher. Naively, I hoped to pitch the book at around High Street price, or maybe just a little more, considering its size. I was in for a shock. Createspace, so I thought, set a minimum price at which they can make a profit and give you a small royalty. I was horrified to find that the minimum price I could place the book on sale for was £14.67….. and that gave me precisely £00-00 royalties.

All of a sudden I was thrust into the world of stepping a book up to a higher cost simply to try and earn a little from my endeavours. I should say at this point that I was constantly receiving input from friends and relatives, and my heart was torn between my initial pricing thoughts and the reality of writing for nothing.

I decided to price ‘Opening Moves’ at $19.99 / £16.99, which offered me royalties of $1.42 and £1.39 per hard copy. When you consider what the reader is paying out, that represents a lot less in %age terms than a traditionally published author, according to my research, whereas the e-books certainly seem to be more.

My books tended to terminate in natural breaks, with two notable exceptions. Book#2 ‘Breakthrough’ topped 330,000 words, and I was told that it was too much. I split it into #2 and #3 and published them shortly after one another.

Book#7 ‘Endgame’ proved to be otherwise and spawned a final book. It had been my intent to finish on #7 but I simply could not get the story in satisfactorily. In the end, Book#8 ‘Caïssa’ was born and became the smallest book I produced [except for the bio sets that accompany each book]. It is also the only book for which I have received complaints regarding size, suggesting that it was too small. I suspect I am a victim of my own standards in that regard.

With my profit making head on, it is for certain sure that I could have done the same amount of writing, produced nearer twelve books of acceptable size, and gained probably 25% or so more royalties.

In the attached charts, you can see the values involved and I hope that they make the situation just a little clearer for you.

As I said earlier, making money was not my prime concern. However, it is now a serious concern, having been shown how much money can be made if you get lucky and with the sirens of early retirement singing soft music in my ears 🙂

None the less, I stick to my pricing policy . . . even after looking at the figures on the charts I prepared for your gaze!

As an aside, I do wonder how often readers check on book details before they buy.

In a bookshop, it is a simple task. You can see pretty much all you need to know. But e-sales pose a different scenario, and I am certainly sure that some unscrupulous writers take advantage of the hidden nature of size/pages/content. If you look at Amazon, it won’t take you too long to find a book of less than a hundred pages for sale at prices that would bring a tear to your eye.

You have no input over ‘pages read’ royalties, except to decide if you wish to enter the programme or not.

I am a member of KDP and KU, and believe I make some nice extra royalties from it, as well as enjoy the daily climb in pages read from Brazil to Australia.

So to summarise, my advice would be to decide upon your whole purpose behind writing and make your decisions accordingly. I certainly believe that you can price yourself out of contention, and equally give away your work. I have seen statements such as ‘if you don’t value it, how will others value it?’ A fair point. In the end, you must be comfortable with your decision and remember: It is NOT set in stone and you can alter it whenever you choose.

I hope this has helped you to organise the issue in your mind.

The very best of luck with your work 🙂

Leaning on -ING Verbs (The Self-Editing Guide Part 7)

Humans are wonderful multi-taskers. We can walk while we talk, eat while we read, and even plan out our upcoming work-in-progress while we perform our daily chores. In some cases, we can even do more than two things at once. Aren’t we breathing while we do these things? Our faces are likely holding an expression that reflects our mood. Our hearts are beating. These are things that are almost always done (unless you’re writing about vampires and there is no heartbeat or breath to take) in conjunction with other things. However, there are some things that simply cannot be done at the same time as other things. You can’t walk while you skip, you can’t yell while you gulp down water, and you certainly can’t stand up while you cross a room. That is why it is harmful to depend on -ING verbs too much when writing.

An -ING verb used after a comma usually indicates that something is happening at the same time as another thing.

I stood up, walking across the room and opening the door.

Wait, what? The sentence is saying that the -ING verbs walking and opening are happening at the same time the first part of the sentence is happening. So the author is saying the character stood up while walking across the room and opening the door. Is that plausible? No. But you wouldn’t believe how often I come across it both in books I’m editing and books I’m reviewing.

Using -ING is widely believed to soften the narrative a bit, to add a touch of poetic prose to the story. Many authors strive to have a healthy dose of poetic prose in their story, so this mistake is often made with good intentions. However, to engage your readers, your story must have a touch of reality as well. If they’re rolling their eyes, their next step is throwing your book across the room. And in this case, they may even roll their eyes while chucking your book—because that’s somewhat logical if they don’t give a hoot what it knocks over in the process.

Instead, only utilize -ING verbs to indicate an action is happening at the same time as another if it’s something the character can actually accomplish. Otherwise, you can use the phrase and then to connect the two fragments if you don’t want to leave them as two choppy sentences.

I stood up, and then I walked across the room and opened the door. 

In this situation, the character has now accomplished three tasks and no one scrunched their eyebrows or imagined the character doing all three things at once. If you really want to keep the -ING verbs, you can even try this:

I stood up before walking across the room and opening the door.

No commas, and everything works. This is completely okay. However, if you are writing an action scene where your character is in a dire situation, you can set the pace by removing -ING and keeping the text simple, direct, and to the point. This may lose you a few prose points, but if it’s a serious situation, your readers probably aren’t worried about imagery and they likely won’t demand a soft pattern of words. They want to know what happens to the character. They want to be engrossed in the story. Any accidental slowing-down of the narrative during a fast-paced action scene can throw off the pace and lose the effect—as I’ve mentioned in previous articles. Save the soft, flowy narrative for the moments after the action. That gives your readers a breather to recoop after what you put them through.

Most times, I get caught up in writing and I end up finding that I slipped a few illogical ones in there without realizing. It’s a nasty habit I try and fail to break. I, too, want soft, flowy prose in my stories. However, when self-editing, I scan the text for those -ING verbs and I reread the sentence without them. If it sounds bolder and more direct without them, then that’s the way I want to go and I rework the sentence until walking becomes walked, opening becomes opened, and so on.

You won’t want to change every single -ING verb you find, and that’s okay. You also need a healthy dose of balance in your story. But you need to be mindful of this when editing so you can spot the phrases that don’t make sense and fix them. And don’t get discouraged if you find more than you expected. As Earnest Hemingway reminds us:

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Jessica Victoria Fisette is the author of The Soul Reaper series, Fragments, and The Aldurian Chronicles. Her hobbies include discovering the benefits of natural medicine, wine tasting, and trying new recipes in the kitchen. She likes to unwind by typing out a scene or two in her latest obsession or indulging in a good book. Having been passionate about writing since she was a little girl, she is constantly coming up with new ideas for future stories and creating unique, strongwilled—albeit flawed—characters to overcome the difficult obstacles she places before them. Having spent all her life in rural Southeast Texas, she appreciates the tranquility of country living and hopes to implement such a love for nature into her beautiful, ever-so-curious little girl.

You can follow her by clicking the links below. 

Facebook

Twitter

Website

Fantasy Genre: The Spectrum of Magic

The Fantasy Genre

The Spectrum of Magic

 Many things separate the fantasy genre from other genres, the variety of characters – dragons, fairies, elves, dwarves, etc. – talking trees, or mystical locations, but none are as important as the magical system that you use.

As you create a magical system, there are acceptable patterns that you may follow. Remember to create a system unique to your story and always consistent.  Adam Johnson writes about magical systems and how to create them.

 

Hard magic, Soft magic, and the Middleground.

 

Soft Magic:

Soft magic is an underlying force that isn’t quite explained. An Example is The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Tolkien never really explains the way his magic works so, we are left with a sense of wonderment and feeling like there is powerful energy at work in the background. He executes this well because he doesn’t use magic to solve the character’s problems. He doesn’t just have Gandolf teleport Frodo to Mount Doom because that wouldn’t make any sense to the reader and would subsequently make the magic and by extension, the whole story, seem weaker.

Soft magic can be a great tool for creating a sense of wonderment in your world. However, you must be careful in how you use it. When creating a soft magic system, you should do it in a way that just supports the characters and the feel of the story. You should not use magic to solve problems in a soft magic system. If you do, it will feel like you’re creating new rules for each situation to give your character a way out. That gets old really fast. Often, in soft magic, Spells won’t turn out the way the character intended them to. If something completely unexpected happens, that the character didn’t see coming, that’s ok because the reader didn’t see it coming either. So, in Soft magic, the Magic system should be there to support the ambiance of the story, not advance the plot. Unless the magic causes problems for the character, then, it’s perfect for the plot.

 

Hard Magic:

Hard magic is where the author lays out the rules and applications for the reader. This is done so the reader can have fun and feel like a part of the magic. It also allows the author to come up with all kinds of tricks and twists within their magic system. These are my favorite types of systems to write. They allow me to have fun creating the system. As a reader, I love understanding the inner-workings of a magic system and seeing what the author comes up with and if it seems comprehensive to the rules set forth.

If you think of it in superhero terms, You are introduced to your hero then you are introduced to their powers. Once you know what their powers are, you already have a great idea of what they can do and what their limits are. From there the author can use those abilities to come up with a whole host of abilities that remain within that power set. Each new ability that makes sense will excite the reader and give them a greater sense of realism.

 

The Middle Ground:

The Middle ground is creating a balance between those two ends of the spectrum. It means giving your reader a good idea of what to expect while still maintaining a sense of wonder within the world. The Harry Potter series is a perfect example of a great middle ground magic system. Ms. Rowling gives us some general guidelines to how her magic works. We know that they need a wand and that they need to know the correct incantations. Those rules stay pretty consistent throughout the series but, She also adds new rules and new applications of magic in each book. This allows her to retain a great sense of wonderment over all. So, each individual book stays very consistent with the rules that have been introduced in that book. This means that her whole series was somewhat soft magic but, each individual book was hard magic. This created a wonderful balance that is a blast to read and easy to get lost in.

 

 Traditional Forms of Magic

• Abjuration: The power to protect/heal.

The school of Abjuration is focused on defensive and healing powers. The can create physical and magical barriers such as walls and force fields. The create glyphs and wards to protect an area or person. Glyphs and wards have an incredible range of effects and intensities. They are activated by an enemy crossing into it or passing through it. Once activated, a ward will release the effect that has been stored in it. It can be anything from trapping the enemy to transporting them to another dimension, even instant death.

Abjurers also have potent healing magic. This can range from healing minor cuts to restoring entire limbs. Depending on your magic system, Abjurers can even bring the dead back to life.

Feats include:

• Defense Powers
• Force-Field Generation
• Healing

 

• Conjuration: The power to transport living and non-living things.

Conjuration is a craft that requires a great deal of Studying and research. There are several applications of this magic but, The primary way it’s used is for summoning. Summoning is The act of pulling a Creature/Demon or Entity from their realm or their home and transporting them right in front of the mage. Summoning can work a few different ways as well. The creature summoned can be under complete control of the mage, The creature could just attack whatever he sees, and the mage has no control. The Summoner must draw pentacles on the ground. One for themselves and one to contain the creature. From there, the summoner will employ tactics to either strike a deal with the creature or torture them until they agree to help.

Regardless of the tactic, the summoner must always be wary. The creature summoned is not happy to be pulled away from home and usually, want to kill the summoner. So great lengths are taken to ensure the casters safety and the creatures cooperation.

Summoners can also use their power to open portals to different destinations.

Feats Include:

• Creation
• Summoning
• Teleportation

 

• Divination: The power to gain information.

Divination is the school of magic that focuses on gathering information, viewing, and probability. A mage that uses Divination is often called a Diviner. Let’s say you encounter a new situation or machine. You have to experience the situation to figure out what will work and what won’t. After you learn how it works, you’ll start to learn why it works as well. A Diviner can skip those steps by looking at a situation and automatically seeing all the various outcomes for the situation.Divination can also be used to make predictions.

With the Aid of a crystal or a scrying glass, a Diviner can Watch things happen in real time as if he were there. powerful practitioners of the craft can even read thoughts from Far away.

• Extrasensory Perception
• Magic Sensing

 

• Enchantment: The power to influence the minds/emotions.

Note:  This is the magical application of enchantment on another living being. Enchantment of objects follows a different set of rules and can have limitless outcomes.

Enchantment is the ability to control someone’s mind or their emotions. Enchantments can come in many forms but, it is important to note that it does not include possession of a host’s body. The Enchanter can only control the mind and the body, not enter it. Enchanters use this power to make people perform tasks or to tip the odds of a situation in their favor. It is sort of like hypnosis in a sense. In Star Wars, Jedi’s use a form of Enchantment that they call “The Jedi mind trick.” It is a strong power of suggestion that essentially brainwashes the subject. This can also be used for interrogation and the extraction of information.

Feats include:

• Invocation
• Mental Manipulation
• Emotional Manipulation

 

• Evocation: The power to control the forces of Nature for a variety of effects.

Evocation is the practice of Calling forth energies to work for you. It can be summoning fireballs or affecting the energies in your own environment to achieve things like telekinesis. In the hands of an experienced wizard, the school of Evocation can be used to cause tremendous damage. Users of Evocation can call forth lightning and projectiles of concentrated magic energy.

• Animate/Reanimation
• Elemental Manipulation
• Energy Manipulation
• Telekinesis

 

• Illusion: The power to create illusions.

Illusionists are often overlooked and thought of as being weak. This is not the case at all. Being able to trick the mind is an incredibly powerful tool. Creating illusions is pretty self-explanatory. The caster creates a vision of something that’s not really there. Seems simple right? The Illusionist, however, can be incredibly deceptive and has the ability to get themselves in and out of virtually any situation. The only downside for them is that their illusions must be real enough to fool even the most perceptive of people. If someone is very sharp mentally, they can see through the illusion for what it really is.

Some feats include:

• Disappearing
• Illusive Appearance
• Psychosomatic Illusion
• Subjective Reality: create illusions that become partially real.

 

Necromancy: The power to manipulate the forces of Death.

Necromancy is often regarded as the darkest of dark arts. Many of the spells and rituals require some or all of someone’s life force. So, you either have to drain them or kill them to gain the catalyst you need for power. Necromancers are obsessed with power and will stop at nothing to become more powerful. The ultimate goal of any necromancer is to become immortal. Necromancers can raise the dead from their graves and control legions of them depending on their strength and ability. They can speak with the dead and gain control over the undead, i.e., a powerful necromancer could control a vampire, but an extremely powerful vampire isn’t likely able to be controlled. If a necromancer becomes extremely powerful in his lifetime, he has a chance to come back to life as a lich after he dies.

Some Feats include:

• Immortality
• Undead Manipulation
• Skin/bone grafting

 

• Transmutation: The power to transform living or non-living

Transmutation is the ability to transform one thing into another whether the subject is living or not. Granted, as with anything else, there are varying degrees of difficulty. It’s one thing to turn a cup into a pencil but, quite another to turn a person into a plate.This can be used a wide variety of ways.

Some feats include:

• Elemental Transmutation
• Shapeshifting

 

Contemporary Magic

• Blood Magic

 

The mage uses his own blood as a source of power. Blood mages can achieve incredible feats and perform incredible acts of power, all of which are considerably gruesome. The blood mage typically performs a ritual or speaks an incantation to build up the magical energy then, they cut themselves to release the magic along with their blood. So, essentially they pay for magic with their blood or their life force.

Blood Mages can also Twist and bend the blood of another to cause excruciating pain or to control them like puppets on a string. This type of magic is typically considered evil or taboo even in the most diverse of fantasy worlds.

As you create your magic system, remember that the desired goal is for your reader to suspend reality and engage in your world. Provide them with a structure that makes your magic plausible, and they will want to inhabit your world.

 

 

Resources:

Article was written by Adam Johnson for Writer Unite! Workshop

 

 

Author:

Adam Johnson

Since Adam Johnson was a child, he had an insatiable craving for a great story. Whether movies, comic books, TV, he was hooked on the story. An invitation to play Dungeons and Dragons led Adam to write a backstory of one of the characters, and the desire to write fantasy was born. When not writing high fantasy, Adam is restaurant management and a tattoo artist. He also serves as an administrator for the Facebook group, “Writer’s Unite!,” with 41,000 + members from around the world.

Fantasy Genre: Fantasy Worlds – Creating Imagination

Fantasy Worlds – Creating Imagination

“The muse in charge of fantasy wears good, sensible shoes.”
― Lloyd Alexander

 

As a writer of fantasy, you are in control of your reader’s imagination. No other genre allows a writer to create a world for a story to exist in impossible ways. Consider a cloud city in science fiction story. Science fiction can suspend reality to a point, but the events, spaceships, and weapons involved require that there be some grounding in the laws of physics as we know them to be plausible. Those floating cities need anti-gravity machines to exist. Not so in fantasy, magic makes the cities float.

That is not to say that rules do not exist when world building in the fantasy genre. As discussed in a previous article, the magic selected or created for the story must have rules that are followed to be plausible.

Where to begin? You should begin with the plot of your story and your characters. Consider the adventures your character will have throughout the story and then imagine you are the reader. Where would you want the story to unfold? Let’s start with the basics.

The World

Your story can exist anywhere. Create an entire world, a hidden realm, or a magical world existing within a mortal world. The sky can be orange, the grass purple or crystal, the possibilities are endless.

Build your world by considering the following:

• Time Period: Is your adventure in an ancient realm or a modern world? Much of the rest of your decisions regarding the world you create will be influenced by the time period you set it in. Agrarian, industrial or technological? Don’t forget to determine their calender.
• Where do your characters live, forest, mountain, valley, desert? Near a river or an ocean?
• Cold, hot, temperate. Does it rain or snow or is there endless heat? Are there major storms, with lightning, thunder, torrential rains, typhoons, whirlwinds? Or is the climate stable… perhaps due to magic?
• Inhabitants: Describe your characters. Color of hair, eyes, how they move. Decide the clothing they wear. What is their language and is there more than one language spoken? What is their diet?
• Flora and fauna: What animals exit? Are they used for food, burden, transportation, or recreation? Determine the trees, grasses, flowers, agricultural plants.
• Dwellings: Do they live in wooden or mud huts, stone houses, or palaces, suburbs or the city. Single-family units or tribes?
• How do they educate the population or those with magical skills?
• What is their social and family structures? Their beliefs? How do they interact with each other? How do they care for the sick? How do they entertain themselves? Do they have common values or are they in conflict? Are they militaristic or passive?
• History: How did their civilization evolve. Has magic always been a part of the world? What races of magical beings have been lost or still exist. If more than one realm, are they at war?
• Employment: Do they trade or barter? How do people make a living? How are they compensated?
• Transportation: Do they travel via magic, or beast, or in a mechanical vehicle?

Adam Johnson writes about the aspects of world building that often get overlooked.

Your world can be as fantastic as you want it to be. Never limit yourself when creating your world. However, you should start with physics that mirror our own. Meaning, gravity functions the same. Unless, your setting is an alien world but, the physics of that world must be consistent with what we understand about physics. This will keep the world at least somewhat familiar to the reader, making them more comfortable.

Consistency is key to plausibility. If you have made changes to your world, they cannot become an afterthought. Your world and your characters must be consistent, and any changes must be apparent and have solid reasoning for the change. Things should function as much like our world as it can while retaining the details that make your world special. (Such as the wizarding world of Harry Potter. The wizarding world had its own rules but, they were all consistent. Also, that world was hidden from the human world to show the difference and allow our minds to be more open to the concepts that she introduced after.)

It is your world but, it is not just about you. Your world should be somewhere that other people would want to live in. This means that your world should be so immersive that once the reader is finished, they are scrambling to find anything that will put them back in that world. It doesn’t just have to be friendly, it can be a treacherous world that no-one wants to find themselves in but, if you really capture that world in all its glory, the reader will be begging to come back.

Remember to ask yourself, who am I writing this for? Let’s not fool ourselves, we write stories because we love weaving a tale. There’s a story that we want to see come to life, and we take it upon ourselves to craft the story. With that being said, there is always an audience that we are writing for.

 

By Adam Johnson and Deborah Ratliff

Resources:

https://writersedit.com/fiction-writing/the-ultimate-guide-to-world-building-how-to-write-fantasy-sci-fi-and-real-life-worlds/

Quotations from an article written by Adam Johnson for the Facebook group Writers Unite!

https://www.jkrowling.com/

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/world-building

 

Authors:

Since Adam Johnson was a child, he had an insatiable craving for a great story. Whether movies, comic books, TV, he was hooked on the story. An invitation to play Dungeons and Dragons led Adam to write a backstory of one of the characters, and the desire to write fantasy was born. When not writing high fantasy, Adam is restaurant chain management and a tattoo artist. He also serves as an administrator for the Facebook group, “Writer’s Unite!,” with 41,000 + members from around the world.

Deborah Ratliff is a Southerner with saltwater in her veins and love of writing. A lifelong mystery fan, her first novel, Crescent City Lies will be published soon and a second novel, One of Those Days to follow. She has also written numerous articles on writing. Deborah serves as an administrator for the Facebook group, “Writer’s Unite!,” with 41,000 + members from around the world.

 

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/D-A-Ratliff-594776510682937/notifications/

Blog; https://thecoastalquill.wordpress.com/

 

Fantasy Genre: Characters Verisimilitude

 

Fantasy Characters: Verisimilitude

Since we are discussing characters, let’s talk about the most important tool an author can utilize when dealing with character development…

Verisimilitude!

Verisimilitude, defined as the appearance of being true or real, is the author’s ability to make the character seem real. “How do I make my characters seem real,” you might ask. Your character should seem just as real to you as your best friend. You should know them like you know yourself. Make them unique, give them quirks, flaws, and traits. Give them jobs, families, and friends. To truly convey your character in a way that seems real, you must understand who that character is. Deborah has been kind enough to cover your crucial character types and some of the traits that make your characters stand out from the rest so, let’s dig a little deeper into the character’s and how detailing their profession can add considerable depth to a character.

 

Professions: In literature as a whole, people love reading about work, especially if it’s a job that they have been exposed to. This is just as important to a fantasy novel. You may not be able to write about jobs that are directly identifiable with the reader. Let’s face it unless it’s an Urban Fantasy, your Protagonist won’t be working behind the counter of a local McDonald’s.

However, you can still add a sense of realism to the professions included in your fantasy. Do some research into jobs that were held hundreds of years ago. Compare what you know about fantasy to what they were doing in the real world. We all know what a blacksmith is but, do you know what a quartermaster is? Do you know about the smithing process? The heat treat and the quench of the blade are crucial to the hardness, and its ability to keep an edge. It’s adding small detail like this into your work that really makes your story stand out. It also gives you credibility with the reader. Trust me, if you.re talking about a profession that actually exists in the real world you want to have your facts straight. Being an author means opening yourself to constant scrutiny by your peers and the public. They will be all too happy to point out any mistakes you have in your details. This is not meant to discourage you but, to help you add the sense of realism that readers are looking for when they want to totally immerse themselves in your world.

What about professions that don’t exist in the real world? No, your protagonist won’t be working the drive-thru but, they might be an apprentice to a wizard or a master of potions. They could be a demon hunter, or maybe they are something we’ve never seen before. Regardless of the profession, all professions have rules and a lifestyle that comes with it. Compare your profession to real-world professions and find similarities. Find common complaints that your character might have about the work. Maybe your character absolutely loves his job but, doesn’t make a great living doing it. Put yourself in their shoes and see what they would be doing on a day to day basis. Would a sorcerer’s apprentice just hold things and watch his master perform magic? No! He would have to have detailed knowledge of the spell components his master needs and the properties of each. He would be charged with keeping the wizard’s study clean and organized. He would file all the books and scrolls for his master as well as run errands as needed. Again, it’s the small details that you add that make a profound impact on the immersive nature of your world.

Can you overdo it? Of course, you can! You don’t want to add small details to every little thing that your reader encounters in your book, or you’ll end up with a 2,000-page tome with step by step instructions on everything from blacksmithing to knitting. Details are important but, it’s the finesse that they are delivered with that make an author stand out. Your characters, your world is completely your own. You should know as much as you possibly can about them to deliver a real experience of suspended disbelief.

 

 

Resources:

https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/verisimilitude

 

Since Adam Johnson was a child, he had an insatiable craving for a great story. Whether movies, comic books, TV, he was hooked on the story. An invitation to play Dungeons and Dragons led Adam to write a backstory of one of the characters, and the desire to write fantasy was born. When not writing high fantasy, Adam is restaurant management and a tattoo artist. He also serves as an administrator for the Facebook group, “Writer’s Unite!,” with 41,000 + members from around the world.

Writers Unite!:    https://www.facebook.com/groups/145324212487752/

The Fantasy Genre: Characters

The Fantasy Genre

Fantasy Characters

 

“just because a mage wears the black robes does not make him evil.” 
― Margaret Weis

 

Fantasy characters. The moment we begin to think about them I suspect images of characters from our favorite books, movies, or cartoons begin to rise from our memories. Could be a witch or wizard, a dragon or troll, a superhero or an evil stepmother that reminds us of our favorite story. The question is not which character we remember but why. What characteristics of a fantasy character makes them memorable?

Fantasy stories are rarely simple. They are an incredible tale of the impossible told on an epic scale. With such a grand story there must be characters that are equally majestic. They form the core of your story and the conduit to complete the quest.

Overall, our main characters, the protagonist, and antagonist regardless of genre are the hooks we use to draw our readers into our realm. If we don’t provide a character that a reader can identify with the reader loses interest. In a fantasy, while there may be several main characters, the focus will always be on the one character who faces the ultimate conflict. Secondary characters also hold a very important role in the story. In addition to providing support for the main character, they carry subplot arcs to drive the story to its conclusion.

The Protagonist

The most important character in any story is the protagonist. If your reader does not identify with the protagonist, the quality of the story and other characters won’t matter. It is imperative to capture your reader’s heart for them to become engaged.

The protagonist is the hero, and in fantasy as in other genres, this character should possess the strength of soul and determination. Their commitment to the story’s goal and how they deal with conflict and obstacles in their path drives the narrative. Your hero should be flawed, hold secrets, be at times uncertain and afraid. The more human and ordinary the character is the more endeared they become to the reader.

Fantasy adds another level to the protagonist’s abilities, magic. Decide how your character will reveal their powers or skills or react to magic if they do not have powers. Is this quest the hero’s destiny or was he drawn in by accident? Does your character have a dark side, something that must be quelled to complete their task?

This is fantasy. Allow the magical tone of your story to flow through your protagonist.

The Antagonist

Ah, the evil genius. But should your antagonist be entirely evil? The answer is no. It is easy to assign only vile characteristics to a villain. Resist the temptation. As you give your protagonist flaws, give your villain some qualities that your reader can identify with as well. Remember, the villain thinks his motivation is correct. By giving your villain a reason for his evil ways, you bring depth to his actions. Weaving the villain into the lives of the protagonist and his sidekicks also strengthens the power of the antagonist to create greater conflict.

Secondary Characters

There will be sidekicks. There must be sidekicks. They provide a support network and are needed to show the human and vulnerable side of your hero. These characters may not always be physically with the protagonist, but they are an integral part of the story. In fantasy, the variety of characters is boundless and the more imaginative, the more interest for your readers. Think Muggles and Hobbits and dragons and begin to create.

Among the secondary characters you will find the following:

Best Friend: A single secondary character who is a confidant, loyal to a fault, someone, who would give their life for the hero. To create a stronger bond between hero and best friend add depth by disagreement, estrangement, competitiveness, or humor. Placing the best friend in mortal danger often provides the catalyst for the hero to grow and face the conflicts ahead.

Mentor: A classic figure in fantasy, the mentor gives guidance and educates the hero as he follows his destiny. The mentor, who may have magical powers or wisdom, could be someone familiar or a stranger, the relationship strained or close. At some point in the story for the hero to prove they have grown and no longer need their mentor, there could be an emotional parting of the ways.

Romantic Interest: We all love a good romance, and the fantasy genre is no different. A love interest also humanizes the protagonist, adding another layer to the hero’s vulnerability. Often a romantic partner can serve to challenge the hero to remain committed to the quest despite whatever adversities are encountered. Do not make the romance larger than life or it will overshadow the ultimate quest, keep the relationship grounded and real.

 In truth, these characters minus a magic spell or two, are characters found in any genre. The differences are often in the minute details. Be inventive, allow some characters not to be traditional. Never lose sight of the world you have created and allow your characters to reveal the magic it holds to your readers.

  

Resources:

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/fantasy-fiction

https://www.jkrowling.com/

https://www.tolkiensociety.org/

 

Deborah Ratliff is a Southerner with saltwater in her veins and love of writing. A lifelong mystery fan, her first novel, Crescent City Lies will be published soon and a second novel, One of Those Days to follow. She has also written numerous articles on writing. Deborah serves as an administrator for the Facebook group, “Writer’s Unite!,” with 41,000 + members from around the world.

 

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/D-A-Ratliff-594776510682937/notifications/

Blog; https://thecoastalquill.wordpress.com/